Top Ten Reasons to Caucus for John Edwards.

From a letter to the Newton (IA) Daily News, via the Edwards campaign blog.

10. John doesn't owe any favors to Karl Rove, Dick Cheney or Bill O'Reilly.
9. We will all sing, "When Johnny Comes Marching Home Again" when he brings the troops back.
8. John lives the American Dream and hasn't pulled the ladder up behind himself.
7. No more "great moments in Presidential speeches" on Late Night with David Letterman.
6. John uses five syllable words without inserting his foot in his mouth.
5. During John Edward's inauguration, Ann Coulter might choke on her own Adam's apple.
4. John's campaign office is the closest walk to the Newton Maidrite.
3. The "axis of evil" and "weapons of mass destruction" phrases will only be found in history books.
2. Americans won't be forced to go to Canada, France, or England to have quality, free health care.
1. John Edwards motto is "just say NO to lobbyists."

My offering for a more global substitute for #4 is inspired by Atrios.

4. It'll piss off the Village.